Third Place

Arabica Coffee House is one of mine 😉

The term was coined by sociologist Ray Oldenburg in a book he published in 1989 called The Great Good Place: Cafes, Coffee Shops, Bookstores, Bars, Hair Salons, and Other Hangouts at the Heart of Community.

I first heard the term mentioned by respected philosopher, professor, colleague, and all around good human being Justin Miller. We were working together on a campus day presentation at Cuyahoga Community College, when he introduced the concept to a crowd of academics. The basics are this: 1st place is home, 2nd place is work, and there, thankfully, exists a bunch of third places where creativity, conversation, and connection abound. In my notes, I have scribbled examples of third places he mentioned such as the Forum in ancient Rome or a contemporary English pub – places where ideas spring organically from interaction with others.

According to the summary provided on Wikipedia, hallmarks of these third places include:
1) Neutral Ground – Nobody feels obligated to be there. People are there because they choose to be.
2) Leveler – No hierarchy here. Nobody much cares about your high flutin degree from your Ivy League School.
3) Conversation is where it’s at – The place is bustling with talk.
4) Accessibility and Accommodation – People feel welcomed and cared for in these places.
5) The Regulars – You can count on some familiar faces there to welcome you into the fold.
6) A Low Profile – These places are not pretentious. They emit the come as you are, stay as you want , drop your bags at the door feelings of home.
7) Playful – Third places are often a place to feel light. Jovial. Full of banter, elbow nudges, and lively laughter.
8) A Home Away from Home – These places provide a sense of belonging. Individuals “feel a piece of themselves is rooted in the space, and gain spiritual regeneration by spending time there.”

What is really the most defining feature of a third places is how it makes you feel – accepted, inspired, at ease. These places make you feel like you are a part of something bigger than yourself. A glorious part of the collective.

Perhaps my old boss turned friend, Dr. Jay Michael Thomson said it best when in his big gregarious way he pronounced, “Place is bigger than geography. Place becomes a code-word for relationships.”

I want to thank Tim and Tina (owners of Arabica in DTW Willoughby) for providing a third place for so many of us!

I’ve come to value the friendship they have offered (in addition to a remote work space). It truly has become my version of “Cheers” without the booze 🙂 I love that Tim knows as soon as he sees me to ask if I’ll be going with my 90% of the time beverage choice (iced mocha with whip and shakey chocolate) or my 10% of the time choice (the “Elvis”). I love that Tina was willing to do Facebook ‘Lives’ with me and silly Santa poses. I love that they let me play pretend barista and that they are so supportive of other small businesses (Tim and I pointing to the sticker Janie and I created, not flicking people off as it might appear on first glance!) Our sticker and our Soulscape Deck are both available for purchase here.

As Tim and I were chatting it up one day, he mentioned the joy he feels in having the chance to start someone’s day off differently. He explained how often he is the first interaction someone has in a day, and so he does his best to greet ‘his’ people kindly and send them away smiling. (Part of a third place is that feeling of being kin if you will). These are “relationships you develop 5 minutes at a time,” he proudly told me.

I love that!

And I’m so glad that my 5 minutes at a time have morphed into more like 5 hours at a time 🙂